Oh God, Ryan Storm, oh no

With a heavy heart I must declare that I am a joker. Missing the wide-open net late in the Ryan Storm tie game made me jokerfeed. We live in a society, You say? No. We live in a world where Ryan Storm has done it, which I’ve seen and counted dozens of times since last night.

In the final two minutes of Thursday’s Game 5, Tampa will score twice to win 3-1 and take the lead in the 3-2 series, and if the series ends, perhaps, the Rangers could point to any moment where all is reversed. This is, intellectually, a useless exercise: Lightning is a better team, perhaps significantly, so at some level the Rangers have lost that moment. There was no lightning. But also, if you only choose a certain moment in time, they simultaneously lose a 2-0 game lead and a 2-0 series lead; It’s a bigger beef than any single drama.

But Also Also: It was right there. The defenseman was in her ass. The goalkeeper was on the wrong side of the crease. The net was as open and convex as the ruins of a Roman amphitheater, and invited to your favorite couch like a well-worn donkey’s grove. And he just misses.

It happens! Storm was going the wrong way, and took an off-balance swipe for a short time to respond and whimper. It will happen to their best. (It happens a lot with Ryan Storm.) I love Storm! Probably more than the other Rangers fans, even before last night. He’s a tough 2C in a league without a lot of things that make things happen and make his linemates better and match well with all kinds of playing styles. I hope he makes a lot of money as a free agent this summer, and if he does it from the Rangers, don’t be particularly upset.

But I already know that I will watch this clip throughout the entire offseason. I know it doesn’t speak well of my emotion control, but even if I don’t find it, I can see it frequently and unprepared inside my skull. Sports sucking ass.

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